Katie and I tend to do our shopping during the day so we don't interrupt our evening family time. Cash register employees will typically ask Katie why she isn't at school or what is her grade. Katie's response is usually, "Kindergarten and I do homeschool." Right after this response I immediately get the story of the homeschooled kids who "needed to socialize more" or they usually are helpful and point us to "social" events in the city.
I find myself very patient and loving with these sweet people. At one time, I too, would look at homeschooled kids as weirdos. My first assesment of why they were different is because they did not socialize enough. I have always been the "social butterfly" and could strike up a conversation with anyone. Which brings me to the recent conversations I've had with moms.
Me: "How is Susie doing?"
Mom of child: "Oh great, she's been going to Chuck E Cheese with Sara, went to the waterpark with Julie, and soccer on Wednesday and Thursday nights plus games on Saturdays. She has been having such a blast, she enjoys her friends so much! We've all been so busy, I think I have rarely seen her this summer!"
This is a typical conversation of moms who have their children involved in lots of social events. They call it "active." A mom last week told me that all her son wants to do is hang out with his friends and she feels like she's lost his heart. Mom excuses this behavior with throwing her hands up in the air and saying," kids will be kids." It's not that she's a bad person at all, she considers it a "stage" and part of growth. It's a standard we have adopted. These are scenarios I have seen over and over since I have decided to homeschool Katie. So when I was reading the Michael Pearl 'Strong In Spririt', I had a DUH moment when coming upon this next phrase! "If you provide your children with a busy world where their social needs can be met without you, they may just choose other friends that are not so "old fogey" and develop in a different direction as dictated by their social circle" ~Michael Pearl
This sweet mom who throws her hands up in the air invites Katie and I to have lunch.. So we are at lunch and she is genuinely concerned about Katie's social life. (I would like to add that she is an incredibly wonderful wonderful person and sincerely loves Katie so very much!) She starts suggesting ideas for me to get Katie involved in more social events. Ironically, I look over at Katie during this conversation and she has rounded up four young girls at Mcdonalds and has them in a circle in front of her teaching them to curtsy! I nudge her arm and point her focus to that direction. This is not behavior of a socially withdrawn child. :)
It is important for children to have relationships with other children but socialization should be balanced in moderation: friends should be quality not quantity. They should never be the primary source of socialization. A parent should always teach their children to choose friends wisely. "Do not be deceived, bad company corrupts good morals." 1 Corinthians 15:33
I was busy cleaning the house and Katie stated, "Mom, I am lonely, could I invite Celeste over?" Realizing Celeste might not be available, I throw out my first option which is myself. I said, "Katie, would it be okay if I play with you instead?" That frown turned upside down and she said excitedly, "Sure mom! I'll go get Candyland." I love that she tossed the idea of socializing with a friend to the side to fellowship with me! She could have said, "Well mom, I really just want to play with a kid!" But I love that I have sweet fellowship with her and that I am her number one choice!
 |
| I thought I would add a picture of sweet Celeste :) She is truly an amazing friend! |
nb
ReplyDelete