Homeschool ain't as hard as I thought!: A Ruth Mentality

Naomi had it bad. She lost her husband. Then her two sons. All that was left was her 2 daughter in laws. She decided to go back to her hometown.....a long journey away. She said goodbye to her 2 daughter in laws and bid them ado. One daughter in law kissed her on her cheek and said goodbye. But there was one special daughter in law who refused to leave her side. She was the one who made her big debut in the Bible. Her name was Ruth.

In this day in age, its rare to find women who love or even respect their mother in laws, or in laws in general. Mother in laws are infamously known for meddling in the grown children's business, overextending their stay, giving too much advice, or not respecting parenting decisions. Some ladies feel it's hard to love our mother in laws.

Do you think these same problems didn't exist back in Ruth's day? Think again. We know for a fact that Naomi was human, and in her humanity, she had faults.

Ecclesiastes 1:9 tells us "What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun" There is nothing new under the sun!

Ruth was young and eligible and off the hook! Why on earth did she choose to stay?

It's no surprise that Ruth won the award in the Bible being the only woman named virtuous. (virtuous: having or showing high moral standards) With her famous plead to her mother in law "Entreat me not to leave thee or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go: and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God, my God: where thou diest, I will die, and there will I be buried: the Lord do so to me, and more also, if aught but death part thee and me." Ruth 1:16-17

Ruth did just as she said and followed Naomi back to her hometown where Ruth was treated unfairly for being a foreigner. I wonder if Ruth rolled her eyes when Naomi made this pity party statement upon arrival "(when the town saw them) they said, "Is this Naomi?" (they were surprised to see her) and she said unto them, "(Woe is me) Call me not Naomi, call me Mara, for the Almighty hath dealt very bitterly with me." Ruth 19-20 After all, Ruth left her hometown to be with Naomi. Did Ruth feel that Naomi was ungrateful for her dedication? It was said that there, in Naomi's hometown, Ruth worked in the fields to support her and Naomi, "Let me go now to the field and glean (glean: gather grain left behind from the harvesters. The poor persons way of eating) ears of corn after him in whose sight I shall find grace. And she (Naomi) said unto her "Go my daughter." Ruth 2:2 Wonder if Ruth thought 'really, you going to come help or what?' And there in the field is where she met Mr. Boaz, owner of the field and relative of Naomi, who took notice of her. He said, "It hath fully been showed to me all that thou hast done to thy mother in law since the death of thine husband; and how thou hast left thy father and thy mother and the land of thy nativity and art come unto a people which thou knowest not thou heretofore." Ruth 2:11 Boaz knew she was a good woman and instructed the reapers (harvesters) to purposefully leave more behind for Ruth to glean. It didn't take long for the people to see how kind and wonderful Ruth was. Ruth's morals and kindness won a spot in the hearts of Naomi's people. It was said of Ruth, "for all the city of my people does know that thou art a virtuous woman" Ruth 3:11

"Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies." Proverbs 31:10

Naomi instructed Ruth to marry Boaz. (now she's telling her what to do:-)) How many of us would trust a decision so permanent as that with our mother in laws? But Ruth trusted her and did what she advised. Of course, there were some kinks. By law, he was not the next of kin to inherit her. So Boaz had to do some seroius wheelin and dealin with the next of kin. Once Ruth married Boaz, they had a child. Through the descendants of that child, came Jesus. Looks like old Naomi knew what she was talking about and Ruth was smart for trusting her. All the while God's hand was upon them all.

When sharing a story to my husband about a person not taking care of their mother or their own mother in law, a light bulb moment happened when he said to me, "They are fools. They are teaching their children not to help take care of them."

He has true wisdom. The Bible says, "Be not deceived, God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap" Galatians 6:6

Katie and her Great Grandmother-Lou

So how do we teach our children to have a Ruth mentality? We start by practicing ourselves. It doesn't matter what mistakes you have made or how far gone you think your heart is or how evil your mother in law is, it's not too late to turn it around.

In a perfect world, we would have perfect mother in laws and we would be perfect ourselves. Since that is not the case, our best option is to practice doing what's right!

I once had a dog that I neglected to train or play with. I had no real bond with her just the drudgery of having to change her food and water. On a vet's visit after 4 years of owning her, we found out she was sick. As we had to care for her, we started investing our time into her. Though she was a serious dog and kind of a hard shell, I accepted her how she was and kept fulfilling my duties. This investment of charity, grew to affection, which grew to dog love :). The more time and charity I invested in her, the more I bonded with her. As God is true to His Word, He is not mocked, this story doesn't end well for me.

The moral of the story is that you will love whatever you set your charity, time, and affection to. It took a sickness for me to realize the true serious hard shelled one was really me! Once I sought to win her over and her affection, she was loyal and affectionate towards me. Though I don't compare mother in laws to dogs, you get the idea.

Is your mother in law a hard shell? Start investing. Practice kindness. You may see the return in your investment. The Bible says, "Charity never faileth" Be consistent and longsuffering. Your children, young and old, will watch you and gain the Ruth mentality.

*Now on a personal note, my mother in law story is different. Just like her son and the dog broke my hard shell, she did too! I love you Marinda! I will keep practicing like Ruth!*

"Though I speak with tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity (love, goodwill) I become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, does not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoice not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in truth; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. charity never faileth....and now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity."1 Corinthians 13